Confession: Real Housewives

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I confess... I watch The Real Housewives shows.  

I watch them because it's a train wreck that I can't stop watching.

I watch Orange County because I have a sick obsession with seeing familiar places.

I watch New York because I love Bethenny Frankel.  She cracks me up.

I watch New Jersey only occasionally... only if I happen to catch it late at night or while folding laundry.

I do not watch Atlanta.  Let me be clear.  I've caught scenes here and there, but... I can't handle Atlanta.

When I started watching The Real Housewives of Orange County I was extremely disturbed.  I have lived in Orange County my whole life, and I can tell you with certainty that these women do not represent the majority here.  

I've often said that someone should do a show called  

The Real, Real Housewives of Orange County.

The Real Housewives live lavish lifestyles in huge homes with housekeepers and nannies.  

The Real, Real Housewives try desperately to afford to live in Orange County on one income (or even two), living in tiny homes with no yards, possibly with a cleaning lady once or twice a month, and swap kid-watching duties so they can go to the grocery store in peace every once in a while.

 The Real Housewives take a limmo to Fred Segal to spend the day shopping and pampering in the spa.

The Real, Real Housewives get their nails done at Happy Nails while bribing their kids with suckers to sit quietly in the front and not cause a scene.

 The Real Housewives overturn tables and fight like cats and dogs.

The Real, Real Housewives have fights with cats and dogs... and lose (both stories for another day).

 The Real Housewives think they are hot, and look for any excuse to be seen in a bikini.

The Real, Real Housewives are insecure, and will do anything to avoid being seen in a bikini.

 The Real Housewives rarely have a nice thing to say about one another.

The Real, Real Housewives get encouragement, empathy, compassion, help and genuine love from one another... at least that has been my experience. 

So if you don't live in Orange County... don't believe that this show accurately represents us.

I choose to believe that not everyone in New York insists on being called "the Countess",  that not everyone in New Jersey has been arrested for cocaine possession, and that not everyone in Atlanta wears wigs and dates married men.

But I will still watch them.